Friday, February 4, 2011

Nice one...

I know "Star Trek: TNG" had a chummy, smarmy servility embedded in it, but watching this clip, I find it laughable to think that Riker would ever be entrusted with his own command...

Riker destroys the Enterprise D

Riker was always a Grade A bootlicker on that show, a consummate kiss up/kick down type, watching him destroy the Enterprise D amuses me. He'll have to do a lot of asskissing to get his own command, given that a Klingon scout was able to so effectively kick the Enterprise's ass under Riker's leadership. I mean, he entrusts Deanna Troi to Helm -- I mean, what the fuck was Riker thinking, there? Sure, Troi's a former squeeze of Riker's, but she's a Counselor -- she's a psych officer -- she's not a pilot, navigator, or helmsman. Now, one could say that the bridge was under fire (again, thanks to Riker's fuckuppery) and they needed anybody they could get...BUT there are plenty of other mouthbreathers on the bridge who'd be better suited than Troi. I would have liked it instead for Troi to say, when Riker orders her to that station) to pipe up "But I don't even know how to do this!"

It would also be great if, in that scene with Picard, where Riker pipes up about aspiring to the captain's chair one day, and instead of being polite and genteel about it, Picard sarcastically gives Riker a pat on the shoulder and says "Sure, Number One. You keep telling yourself that. Maybe I should've called you Number Two, instead." and walks off, muttering.

Just saying, Riker loses the Enterprise D in a slapfight with an obsolete Klingon scout commanded by women Klingons. Kirk would have seduced and impregnated all of those Klingon women and he would have destroyed the ship once he was through, then chased it down with some Saurian Brandy. Picard would have played some kind of Machiavellian head game with them and talked them to death. But Riker nearly gets everybody killed and gets the Enterprise destroyed. Real smooth, Riker. I'd love to see him spin that around the next time a captain's chair opened up. I imagine that smarmy fuck trying to talk his way around that.

"I'm Number One. This beard'll help me buff those shoes of yours, Captain."
Makes me glad I only watched the first season of that show. Q was really the only cool character on it (Data was alright, and Tasha Yar was okay, but they killed her off). Worf was alright. Picard was perhaps okay, but he was never my cup of Earl Grey. The rest were shit, with Riker as the undisputed King of Shit Mountain.