1) Leia is the biggest bitch in the cosmos, yes? I mean, that's not even a controversial point. She's a bitch's bitch. Grand Moff Tarkin understood this, which was why he tartly signed her death warrant.
2) So, granted that Leia is a supreme bitch, I ask you this: How'd Jabba get her in that slave girl costume? I mean, they do a screen wipe from the point when Jabba captures her to later, when we see her in the classic slave girl costume, chained to Jabba's throne/sedan chair.
I mean, we know why Jabba did this -- he was basically saying "You may be a bitch, but you're MY bitch, Bitch." (said in Huttese, naturally)
But what I want to know is how Jabba's minions managed to actually get Leia to wear that slave girl outfit, let alone a chain around her neck. Because if there was anybody in the galaxy who could not be made to do something she didn't want to do, it was Leia.
And yet, there she was, sporting that slave girl costume (not that I'm complaining, mind you -- that was one of the formative experiences of my burgeoning adolescent sexuality, Leia in that getup).
All the same, I only wonder how they got her to wear it. I mean, we know why Carrie Fisher wore it -- George Lucas was like "Wear this, we need to show a little skin, maybe, just to show what a dick Jabba is." But, as a character, it's hard to fathom how they got Leia to wear it.
I mean, even if Jabba's henchmen knocked Leia out and dressed her in that, she'd likely have gotten out of that getup the first chance she got, right? But Leia doesn't look roughed up -- rather, she's just lounging on Jabba's sedan chair, biding her time.
We know that Leia doesn't want to be Jabba's slave girl, obviously. But, how did Jabba manage to convince her? I mean, was Jabba a bigger asshole than Leia was a bitch? How'd he pull off the hat trick of getting Leia to be a slave girl? And in no time flat, mind you -- it's not like she'd been his prisoner for a long time; rather, Leia rolls for Jabba in no time.
Clearly, and this comes as no surprise, Jabba is a pimp. And not just any pimp -- Jabba is the greatest pimp in the history of pimpdom. He didn't even have to rough Leia up; we don't see how he did it, but, somehow, Jabba got Leia to don a slave girl costume and a leash, and, apparently, it didn't take much persuading to do so. Not just that, but the habitually mouthy Leia is silent when she's Jabba's bitch. I can't remember her actually saying anything when she's hanging out with Jabba. She just sits there, the shrew apparently tamed by Jabba's pimptacular skills.
Now, maybe Jabba told her to wear it or he'd kill Han. But, that's not very convincing, since Jabba was clearly intending to kill Han regardless of what Leia did. I don't know. It's one of those mysteries of "Star Wars" that one may never solve.
I mean, we're talking about Leia, here -- this is a woman who, rather than give up the Rebellion to Grand Moff Tarkin, risked (and lost) her entire homeworld, killing billions of people -- she's one seriously tough cookie. But Jabba rolls her in no time flat. How? Clearly, the Hutt race have some kind of Master Pimping power that rivals the Force in its awesomeness. It must be something like that. How else to explain it?
"Soon you will learn to appreciate me."
~Jabba the Hutt, to Leia Organa
